try, denial and fear.
What are you trying?
I think I forgot that this is always what I wanted to avoid.
...
These are the consequences
you always wanted to avoid
That you think something
That I do not want you to think
're like a son, after all
And I ma person ; s horrible world
(So horrible that I mourn my best friend
For all sorts of foolish things without reason
my own selfishness and envy.
A damn proud that I burn.
Ten times. It pleases me greatly.
the point that makes me want to write
Because you know, I too have felt this way. With that fear.
It hurts so much when barely pokes through my mind
makes me shudder. I also think I would break into pieces)
... To you, my son play, I spend most of that writing
Wishing Having A
avoided suffering And I wanted to avoid something like this
My own suffering
LIKE THIS!
Understand? Do you understand?
I do not want. I do not want to change that which was done.
... It's the kind of things that I can not rhyme line after line.
Strange, no? You can talk on the same day of the person you shared a little of their feelings, whether passengers or eternal. And then want to try something with the same person with whom you spoke of that heartbreak. Who has heard a few more of your feelings, and seen your attempts with a friend we both share.
Me.
I'm not second-table dish.
I had done before. I'm sure. But I have una memoria que ahora mismo aborrezco.
O tal vez, fue que tú me lo decías de broma. Un pequeño intento desesperado. Yo te respondía de la misma manera. Sin profundizar razones.
“Sólo amigos”. Buenos amigos.
¿Lo captas? Buenos amigos que se comparten las ideas. Que no necesitan nada más. No contacto físico. Nada que implique una verdadera relación de noviazgo. O la que yo quisiera tener.
Tengo tanto miedo de lastimarte. Siempre lo he tenido, desde que vi tus ojos. Desde que te conozco un poco más. Tengo miedo de salir lastimada. To feel the kind of feelings I felt at that time. This unfortunate event.
"He saw it as a good friend. Then, barely spoke a word to me. And now uses the same kind of phrases that I irritate me. I do not remember, but his indifference makes me rage. "
I do not want something like this happens to you.
Of course you do not know one of my fears. One of the things I think I do without difficulty. That, therefore, find it really hard to avoid. Sometimes I feel like people away from me. I have much fear of alienating people who are around me.
Whenever I can try to listen to people, you know? Whatever I say, I listen. And always try to respond. To let know that I care and listen to what they say. But sometimes I focus only on myself. In my useless things. And just enough for me to feel that people are moving away from me. As an effort in vain, which, stupidly, I keep keep doing it. For my precious people follow me around.
But of course, just yesterday you told me. Does that you liked me. My ability to listen.
"Morin, Where are you? I deserve a slap for illusory. "
Should have seen. Small signals. I should not believe that just babble what trouble you, out of this. Because I thought you had already exceeded this. That this would only be just a gathering of friends. No way you try to tell me something that ultimately could not do it. Until then, without looking into my eyes, through written words. (That's where you look like him. But he was on the phone).
Still, however, as before. Maybe a little more confident. That pleased me a little.
hurts me to think that this is the excuse that you could use to get away from me.
If you do, at least I know that you are someone who is not worth it. I hurt, sure.
And then, it will be a battle between my pride, against the little friendship that I have been with you, let you know about, or that everything written here about you remains one of the things you never hear me say.
If not, and everything is in a way that I can call, "just like before (let's face it, there will be), I will be surprised. Then I could follow the normal course of a quiet friendship.
... "I can have some faith in you? I can trust that nothing will change? What we do not distance? Curious. Another friend and I were chatting about that nights ago.
I like this and as we are, really.
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